On a lighter note, as they say on the news, Parasites Turn Ants into Berries. Not always, you understand, or aardvarks would be fatter. But definitely sometimes.
There's a nematode worm called a cephalotes, which likes to be eaten by ants. Once in the ant's digestive system, it somehow manages to turn its abdomen red and render it temptingly swollen, so it looks like a particularly lush berry. The ant, not the parasite. If you're already inside the digestive system of an ant, disguising yourself any further would be redundant. Having a big swollen berry at the back also makes the ant heavy on its feet, and an easy target for berry-eating birds.
So, a bird eats the ants, the cephalotes get back in the bird's tummy, which they like, and the circle of life is renewed. As it says in the piece, now we know what Elton John was talking about. My belly's been temptingly swollen for years, and I'm a bit heavy on my feet, so maybe I've got a parasite. I guess I'd better keep an eye out for condors.
We all thought something similar was happening at Bristol City, where our striker Enoch Showunmi was about to be snapped up by Leeds United, my other club. I wasn't quite sure how to feel about this, but now the move's been cancelled anyway, so I've decided to be not quite sure how I would have felt about it instead.
On balance, I think I was prepared to write it up to natural forces. Players come, they go, we buy some more, that's the centre circle of life, yada yada yada. His abdomen wasn't obviously berrylike, but he holds the ball up well, which I guess is the football equivalent. Leeds thought so too, but he's decided to stay in Bristol. They couldn't agree personal terms, which means City offered him more money. I wish rival employers would come and bicker over me.
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26/01/08 @ 03:00